Yup I'm on that Tori Kelly ish. I always find myself thinking about wanting to have someone with me on this journey. This desire leads me into temptation. This temptation makes me want to lower my "standards" by going after someone that doesn't fit what I'm looking for. Standards are a personal thing and we all have our own. For myself I look for a lot of key qualities within someone's personality & choice of lifestyle. The kind of people I try to avoid dating are people w/ O.C.D., clingy peeps, people who care too much about their looks, pessimists & "realists" (there needs to be a new term for realists because optimists achieve real things, just saying. Realists are just people with limitations) end side rant, and people who are closed-minded and get offended easily by anything and everything.
The main thing I look for in a person is passion, and I'm fortunate enough to be able to see it in someone rather quickly. Someone with an open-mind, and a creative one. I like people who can appreciate the small things. Independence & always wanting to grow is something I look for that's very important in my future significant other.
Sometimes I just want to have someone to hold hands, watch movies, cuddle, create, dance, cook, read, game, go on adventures & watch dance videos with. But I won't do it with someone I can't see myself having a future with. I'm very time-conscious so I won't waste my time settling for people who are convenient. I'm patient & picky. That's just me.
Meh
Thursday, July 31, 2014
Wednesday, July 30, 2014
My response to kindess
From time to time someone I know will come along & send me a lengthy text. Within that text will be words of gratitude & love because I sparked something in them; hope, inspiration, ideas. And when I receive these types of things I never know how to respond & I'm trying to figure out why that is. I'm saying this on a very serious level. I will usually just look at it & feel something but not respond. I've never been able to take a compliment so I know that has to do with it. If I receive one in person I just stutter & smile & respond with a simple "thank you", I like your face. I think it's because I'm a bit more self-conscious about the things I say now than I have before. When I talk or text, I can respond with a butt-load of things. And a lot of the times I feel like people don't want to hear it so I minimize my response or opinion to things. I know when people are tuned in to what I have to say and when they don't. But it doesn't make sense to me why I choose to reply so poorly to a lengthy text praising me & thanking me when obviously they would appreciate something like that from me. I'm weird. K bye.
Wednesday, July 23, 2014
My Art; reflection
I have 3 different approaches to choose from when deciding on choreographing to a song.
The first method which I can do the fastest is the fun/ simple/ recycled method.
This method is typically the most fun because I do not think technically when I'm in this mind set. I choreograph to obvious parts of the music and throw in lots of grooves & some power motions & creative freedom (improvisation). The focus here is just doing movement that is pure fun, nothing else. Since I want it to be fun on the most broad platform I can put it on, I make sure it's not difficult. I use the term "recycled" because a lot of the moves I put together are things I'm comfortable/ familiar with. That is the reason why I can choreography routines of this nature so quickly.
The 2nd method I use is the technical/ growth method.
When I enter music with this mentality I focus on everything going on in the song. I want to make sure I don't miss any sounds and I carefully select what comes to me naturally & sometimes not so naturally. With pieces like this I focus on musicality, unfamiliarity, visual appeal, & speed (even though I'm all about visual appeal)
I'd like to think I have really good musicality if I do say so myself. I find it easy to bounce from voice to music & to make it visually clear in my choreography. When I focus on musicality I aim to enhance the way I listen to music and bring it to life. What's also extremely important to me is doing movement my body is unfamiliar with, so I try to stay out of my comfort zone but not completely because I want to stay true to what I know while also diving into new movement. Since musicality is a high focus in this method, I always try to increase my speed of movement & execution as a dancer. I believe being able to move quickly & knowing how to control that speed is very important in every style of dance.
The 3rd method is one that I don't do as often because I'm usually overwhelmed from using the first 2 methods for classes I teach & shows/ videos. This 3rd method is like a release for me. Whenever dance starts to feel like work to me, a song will find me and speak to me. When that moment happens my body enters this trance and begins to create movement naturally and with a ton of energy I never knew I had. I'm not always aware of my surroundings when I enter 3rd method. My mind, body & soul get lost & does what it needs to do. With this, I typically do not think at all. I just let the music move me.
Why I call this post "My art; reflection" is because I've found that my creative process is similar to the way I live.
I'm very good at doing things I'm familiar with and can do it quickly & always have a good time doing it, just like method one.
Other times I step out of the known to learn things I hunger for in order to improve in whatever aspect of life I feel like I need to improve on.
Other times I just get lost. And that's one of my favorite things to do.
The first method which I can do the fastest is the fun/ simple/ recycled method.
This method is typically the most fun because I do not think technically when I'm in this mind set. I choreograph to obvious parts of the music and throw in lots of grooves & some power motions & creative freedom (improvisation). The focus here is just doing movement that is pure fun, nothing else. Since I want it to be fun on the most broad platform I can put it on, I make sure it's not difficult. I use the term "recycled" because a lot of the moves I put together are things I'm comfortable/ familiar with. That is the reason why I can choreography routines of this nature so quickly.
The 2nd method I use is the technical/ growth method.
When I enter music with this mentality I focus on everything going on in the song. I want to make sure I don't miss any sounds and I carefully select what comes to me naturally & sometimes not so naturally. With pieces like this I focus on musicality, unfamiliarity, visual appeal, & speed (even though I'm all about visual appeal)
I'd like to think I have really good musicality if I do say so myself. I find it easy to bounce from voice to music & to make it visually clear in my choreography. When I focus on musicality I aim to enhance the way I listen to music and bring it to life. What's also extremely important to me is doing movement my body is unfamiliar with, so I try to stay out of my comfort zone but not completely because I want to stay true to what I know while also diving into new movement. Since musicality is a high focus in this method, I always try to increase my speed of movement & execution as a dancer. I believe being able to move quickly & knowing how to control that speed is very important in every style of dance.
The 3rd method is one that I don't do as often because I'm usually overwhelmed from using the first 2 methods for classes I teach & shows/ videos. This 3rd method is like a release for me. Whenever dance starts to feel like work to me, a song will find me and speak to me. When that moment happens my body enters this trance and begins to create movement naturally and with a ton of energy I never knew I had. I'm not always aware of my surroundings when I enter 3rd method. My mind, body & soul get lost & does what it needs to do. With this, I typically do not think at all. I just let the music move me.
Why I call this post "My art; reflection" is because I've found that my creative process is similar to the way I live.
I'm very good at doing things I'm familiar with and can do it quickly & always have a good time doing it, just like method one.
Other times I step out of the known to learn things I hunger for in order to improve in whatever aspect of life I feel like I need to improve on.
Other times I just get lost. And that's one of my favorite things to do.
Wednesday, June 25, 2014
My life right now
The past 2 days I spent about 20 hours studying the music industry.
I've been listening to pod casts, watching videos, and lots of reading.
And I have found that I want to go to UCLA for a semester to take a class or two, intern/ work for certain companies & train in dance.
I also spent a few hours reorganizing my phone & installing new apps.
I want to be able to maximize my productivity while staying organized because 9 out of 10 times I'm usually not because I forget everything.
I've been slacking a bit on the whole dancing aspect of my career but creating choreo has been much easier now than it has in the past.
I've been doing a lot of planning and organizing for a summer dance program that I hope everyone takes advantage of as well.
I finally acquired a new video-editing software & music software for all my media needs. (Bye bye Windows Movie Maker)
I'm planning on purchasing my first keyboard soon unless someone gets me a Casio keyboard for my birthday. *wink wink
I'm also starting to get into coding, really funtastic stuff.(Computer coding)
I've been blogging more personal stuff lately than relate-able stuff, I've just been in a different place. I feel like I'm in a training ground. But it's like a happy one.
I'm going to start vlogging now (I'll still keep the baby clips coming).
I'm working on raising money & creating the blue prints for the company that I want to establish "SFC Lifestyle"; Record Label & Talent Agency.
I'm finding a lot of different ways to monetize everything I'm doing & it's a real challenge but definitely a lot of fun.
I haven't really left my house for any reason.
I don't really like socializing either when I'm in "Training mode". I like being in an environment where I can embrace my introverted ways.
This is currently my life. Thank you for always sending me snapchats, facebook crap, tweets & texts that I don't respond to. I'm just not in the right state of mind to talk to you. Nothing personal. I love you, bye.
Saturday, June 21, 2014
I'm still not the me I want to be
I'm always doing a lot but never doing enough. That's the truth.
I'm busy yes, busy getting lost in my head while others jump ahead.
I play games, I play hard, I think hard, I think smart, and every once in a while I fall apart...just so I can reconnect the dots in a different way.
I draw the lines and then I cross them. But I can't see. I don't know boundaries. I'm always lost, and never ready.
This edge is getting lonely, but I promise to keep my head up even though this gravity is tempting.
I'm busy yes, busy getting lost in my head while others jump ahead.
I play games, I play hard, I think hard, I think smart, and every once in a while I fall apart...just so I can reconnect the dots in a different way.
I draw the lines and then I cross them. But I can't see. I don't know boundaries. I'm always lost, and never ready.
This edge is getting lonely, but I promise to keep my head up even though this gravity is tempting.
Sunday, June 15, 2014
Tears & worthiness
Hey Dad,
I want to start off by saying that you are an amazing person. I admire your hard work, dedication, commitment and selflessness. It inspires me and I always wonder how you're able to continue to do what you do in order to make sure we are safe. You've made me think about a lot of things, about who I am and our family these past few years. I never understood much of any of it growing up. I really like when you open up to me about how you feel and share your thoughts and perspective on what you believe. It's those moments where I feel like I'm connecting with you. Whether I get in trouble and you're telling me what I did wrong or should have thought about more clearly or when you give your perspective on a situation. I like when you do that because that's when I see you express yourself the most and that's the side of you I don't get to see often which I wish I could see more of. You're really intelligent when you speak and I look up to that, I just wish other people could witness it too. When you take the time to talk to me or express concern I feel like we connect more, and I get to see what you're thinking. And sometimes when you talk to me about things, I find a new reason to become a better person. I know how much you value mom and this family. I know how much you want for me and Kyle. I'm grateful to have you even though I'm really not the best at showing how appreciative I am. Everything I do now is not only for myself but for you, for mom, for Kyle and for the whole world. I dream big because you and mom came from a very bad place. I understand the pain of having to work a job that isn't your dream. I understand that the same old routine can wear you out. I understand that nothing is easy and that's why I can't aim low. I don't want to continue to see you and mom struggle. And I know the answer to all my prayers is following what makes me the happiest. Because I learned on my own that when I'm happy doing something, I will do everything in my power to keep getting better at it and to find many ways, not just one way, to be successful. I learned the importance of risk. You and mom took a risk to come to America in order to live a better life. I'm not afraid to take risks and step outside of the lines because I know what it takes to be successful. I know you still don't agree with my career path. But I know deep down in my soul, what ever I choose to do, whether or not you and mom believe in me, I will make it, I have to make it, there's no other way for me. I do research like it's my home work, I'm learning about music and the music industry, I practice my management skills every day. And I'm so happy, I don't care about having a lot because I learned that being rich isn't about how much you have, but how much you can give. I don't care about having a bunch of stuff and I do my best to never ask you or mom for anything either because I know that what keeps me happy is all the stuff I'm doing right now. I want to be able to retire you and mom by doing what I love or inspire you to chase your real dreams because we all have them.
Even though we can't agree on everything, I want you to always know how much I appreciate and love you. Because I wouldn't be able to do anything I'm doing without you. I want you to be happy for my happiness. And I want you to be happy without worrying about anything. You're very important to me and I promise that I will make you proud, my way. I know it's probably not something I should talk about but some times it's hard when the two most important people in my life are supposed to be my biggest fans are never in the audience, it bothers me. And it's cause I'm around other kids who are my students and I see how supportive the parents are of their child, they always say "no matter what my kid chooses to do, I will support them all the way". And when I hear that, and when I see tears run down the face of a parent who's kid is on stage doing their best, I don't know how to feel. So I just don't feel. I think being emotional is stupid because it makes me look weak, and I shouldn't be weak over things like that. That's what I always tell myself, but some times I just wish you could see my progress as a teacher, my progress as a business man, my progress as someone who just wants your support because you care about my happiness and not just my success.
I hope we can both be on the same page one day. Thank you for everything you've done and everything you will continue to do.
I love you.
Your son Vattana R. Thach
I want to start off by saying that you are an amazing person. I admire your hard work, dedication, commitment and selflessness. It inspires me and I always wonder how you're able to continue to do what you do in order to make sure we are safe. You've made me think about a lot of things, about who I am and our family these past few years. I never understood much of any of it growing up. I really like when you open up to me about how you feel and share your thoughts and perspective on what you believe. It's those moments where I feel like I'm connecting with you. Whether I get in trouble and you're telling me what I did wrong or should have thought about more clearly or when you give your perspective on a situation. I like when you do that because that's when I see you express yourself the most and that's the side of you I don't get to see often which I wish I could see more of. You're really intelligent when you speak and I look up to that, I just wish other people could witness it too. When you take the time to talk to me or express concern I feel like we connect more, and I get to see what you're thinking. And sometimes when you talk to me about things, I find a new reason to become a better person. I know how much you value mom and this family. I know how much you want for me and Kyle. I'm grateful to have you even though I'm really not the best at showing how appreciative I am. Everything I do now is not only for myself but for you, for mom, for Kyle and for the whole world. I dream big because you and mom came from a very bad place. I understand the pain of having to work a job that isn't your dream. I understand that the same old routine can wear you out. I understand that nothing is easy and that's why I can't aim low. I don't want to continue to see you and mom struggle. And I know the answer to all my prayers is following what makes me the happiest. Because I learned on my own that when I'm happy doing something, I will do everything in my power to keep getting better at it and to find many ways, not just one way, to be successful. I learned the importance of risk. You and mom took a risk to come to America in order to live a better life. I'm not afraid to take risks and step outside of the lines because I know what it takes to be successful. I know you still don't agree with my career path. But I know deep down in my soul, what ever I choose to do, whether or not you and mom believe in me, I will make it, I have to make it, there's no other way for me. I do research like it's my home work, I'm learning about music and the music industry, I practice my management skills every day. And I'm so happy, I don't care about having a lot because I learned that being rich isn't about how much you have, but how much you can give. I don't care about having a bunch of stuff and I do my best to never ask you or mom for anything either because I know that what keeps me happy is all the stuff I'm doing right now. I want to be able to retire you and mom by doing what I love or inspire you to chase your real dreams because we all have them.
Even though we can't agree on everything, I want you to always know how much I appreciate and love you. Because I wouldn't be able to do anything I'm doing without you. I want you to be happy for my happiness. And I want you to be happy without worrying about anything. You're very important to me and I promise that I will make you proud, my way. I know it's probably not something I should talk about but some times it's hard when the two most important people in my life are supposed to be my biggest fans are never in the audience, it bothers me. And it's cause I'm around other kids who are my students and I see how supportive the parents are of their child, they always say "no matter what my kid chooses to do, I will support them all the way". And when I hear that, and when I see tears run down the face of a parent who's kid is on stage doing their best, I don't know how to feel. So I just don't feel. I think being emotional is stupid because it makes me look weak, and I shouldn't be weak over things like that. That's what I always tell myself, but some times I just wish you could see my progress as a teacher, my progress as a business man, my progress as someone who just wants your support because you care about my happiness and not just my success.
I hope we can both be on the same page one day. Thank you for everything you've done and everything you will continue to do.
I love you.
Your son Vattana R. Thach
Thursday, June 5, 2014
Where I'm at right now
Right now my mind is heavy with creativity, obligations, and goals.
So first let's talk about SFC Lifestyle because that's the number 1 thing on my mind. For those who don't know what SFC is, it's a lifestyle brand that takes the image of an Entertainment Label & Talent Agency. I've built a team and am still in the process of editing our website content and doing videos. Just this morning I was doing research on all the legal aspects of wanting to have a talent agency and record label (Because entertainment labels don't exist). I have to get a standard business license, open up more bank accounts, get contracts, possibly hire an attorney, probably get a separate license in order to be a talent agent. Learn about business expenses and tax forms and tracking my artists. Choosing between LLC and S-corp. I'm most likely doing LLC since I did a decent amount of research on it. I have a ton of fees to pay which I guess would have been obvious to anyone except me.
I have a summer program I want to establish since I now have the resources to do so. I'm thinking of doing an art program in a few different cities; Lowell, Chelmsford, Dracut, Billerica, & Tewksbury. It's totally doable and would be really fun.
I also don't want to find a "job" during the summer because I want full control of my time to teach dance, book gigs, study more, network and even do yard work for some good hard cash. So I came up with an idea to turn that into a business as well.
I actually have my recital this coming Saturday which I'm not 100% prepared for because my solo isn't finished lol. So that is something I really need to get done. Plus I have rehearsal every night.
Wish me luck & I'll continue to keep you posted on my ventures. I plan to start vlogging I think or something like that idk, I just need to clear out space on my phone and my laptop #Struggle is so real
So first let's talk about SFC Lifestyle because that's the number 1 thing on my mind. For those who don't know what SFC is, it's a lifestyle brand that takes the image of an Entertainment Label & Talent Agency. I've built a team and am still in the process of editing our website content and doing videos. Just this morning I was doing research on all the legal aspects of wanting to have a talent agency and record label (Because entertainment labels don't exist). I have to get a standard business license, open up more bank accounts, get contracts, possibly hire an attorney, probably get a separate license in order to be a talent agent. Learn about business expenses and tax forms and tracking my artists. Choosing between LLC and S-corp. I'm most likely doing LLC since I did a decent amount of research on it. I have a ton of fees to pay which I guess would have been obvious to anyone except me.
I have a summer program I want to establish since I now have the resources to do so. I'm thinking of doing an art program in a few different cities; Lowell, Chelmsford, Dracut, Billerica, & Tewksbury. It's totally doable and would be really fun.
I also don't want to find a "job" during the summer because I want full control of my time to teach dance, book gigs, study more, network and even do yard work for some good hard cash. So I came up with an idea to turn that into a business as well.
I actually have my recital this coming Saturday which I'm not 100% prepared for because my solo isn't finished lol. So that is something I really need to get done. Plus I have rehearsal every night.
Wish me luck & I'll continue to keep you posted on my ventures. I plan to start vlogging I think or something like that idk, I just need to clear out space on my phone and my laptop #Struggle is so real
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